If you are one of those people who do not know how to function on their own, your brand new single status may feel like a curse. Getting out of a long-term relationship or marriage can turn the sanest person into an emotional wreck. Whether your last relationship was toxic or lost meaning, it is time to move on.
You already heard the last of your divorce attorney or you just moved into a new place, so Happy Independence Day to you. The single life is awesome and you must cherish it while it lasts.
The empty side of the bed, an overly tidy kitchen, and the pin-drop silence when you get home can feel daunting. Suddenly you have no one to watch T.V with, make a second cup of tea for, get into trivial arguments, and talk about your day at work. Loneliness makes us capable of doing stupid things, like drunk dialing an ex or falling for the next random person who seems interested. As a newly single person, you need to maintain your dignity and break old habits.
There are so many things you can do and enjoy in your own company. Recall the last time you were single, even if it seems like ancient history. There was a time you had personal hobbies; if not, better find one to keep yourself busy. Start painting, cooking, baking, gaming, knitting, or join a fitness club if that could be your thing.
One failed relationship or a dozen, you need time to discover yourself. Immediately jumping into a new one will only worsen your situation. If you’ve been doing that in the past, reflect on the pattern and accept that it’s a terrible idea to repeat. Just because someone stopped loving you does not imply that you are worthless or not good enough; neither does it mean that the person who dumped you is crazy or deserves to die. People get close and drift apart every day. Couples break up, lovers become enemies, and soul mates change. No relationship is perfect and everyone has flaws.
Focus on the good things in life and appreciate your accomplishments. When you learn to love yourself the way you are, the right person will see it too. Set some standards and figure out what you want in a potential partner (or what you actually need). Stay true to your principles and don’t settle for anything less.
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It is possible that your ex was a nice person and collapse of the relationship was your fault. That is by far the most viable excuse to stay single for a while. Maybe you need to let go of some negativity or grow out of bad habits. You need to stop looking down on others or wrongfully judging everyone around you. When you respect people and treat them fairly, the universe will return the favor.
Many people literally become the ‘better half’ of their partner and lose their own identity. If you are one of those, it’s time to get a life and do something for yourself for a change. Travel, go clubbing, splurge on something fancy for yourself, make new friends, and chase your wildest dreams. Nothing is stopping you anymore but yourself, so enough with the silly excuses.
John Adams loves traveling, reading, and writing. He encourages his readers to improve their quality of life by incorporating positive things and maintaining good conduct. Blogging about personal opinions or life experiences makes him happy, and he is always open to constructive criticism.